So while I sit here, waiting for my numbers to return, my platelet count is just nose diving. I get transfusions regularly, but apparently, they haven’t been super clear with some of the potential side effects.

Most of them are pretty obvious and readily apparently.

For instance – you clot ridiculously slowly. I pulled a cuticle out, not thinking much of it. The little fucker bled for almost a full hour.

There’s other not so obvious things.

You get weird splotches on your skin. You bruise super easily. Your gums sometimes bleed, sometimes don’t. Oh, did I mentioned that you SERIOUSLY bruise for like any reason at all?

Ok, fine. All of these things I can accept, I can tolerate, I can deal with them. No big deal, I’ve dealt with worse.

Then, last night, I went to the bathroom. Stood up, and noticed blood in the toilet. Oh shit I thought. That cannot be good. I wiped – more blood. Full on panic. Called my nurse in, explained what happened. After having to go into entirely too much detail, she calls the PA in. Everyone seems pretty calm and normal.

What the hell, man?

Ok, so, they set up a collection thing in the toilet, and tell me just to report back if I have a bowel movement.

They hook me up to platelets pretty early this morning, which means pre-meds, which means IV benadryll, which means, I’m out like a light for several hours.

When the team came in to discuss things with me, everyone just like….waves off the whole bleeding from the rear business. It’s totally normal they say. Probably not a big deal.

Uh. Excuse me. How is a bloody butthole NOT A BIG DEAL.

Why am I the only one concerned?

God dammit. At least WARN a man that might happen. Sheesh!